1. Intro

Many women crave the protection of men. Now why exactly? Well maybe some professor of anthropology would have some sort of primitive survival explanation. Protection from what, you ask? You name it. Do you know how hard and scary it is to be a woman out there on your own? Do you know the things that can happen to women if no one is looking out for them? I'm making women sound too much like victims, and that's not right. But to feel protected is to feel loved. It means the man gives a damn about what happens to you. It may mean he's furious you come home at 9pm instead of 6pm when he was expecting you home. That's a gift. To have someone worried about you and what the hell happens to you. In my own heart a man is fiercely protective. Two hundred years ago, sometimes it was nothing more than protecting the woman's honor; for example, someone badmouths her and husband thrashes the man who did so. Would I be protective of my man? Sure, but in a more feminine way: if he were ill, if he were hungry, if he were tired, if his feet ached, I would meet his needs; I would protect his reputation in public with my life. Does this make any sense? You protect your man by making sure his every need is met, without being a doormat, just out of love. And in return a man gives so much back.

2. Simple gestures

That is such a pretty statement...to protect him by making sure his needs are met. And it is true. There is much to be said about knowing someone cares so much about you, they get upset when you're home hours later then you said you'd be. If you don't believe this, try being a woman on your own. Try coming home to an empty house with no one there to say "I care". My first thought, when I hear of women who get angry at their husbands for various small reasons...women who flounce off if they don't get their own way...or ride their husbands about petty issues....my first thought is that they have no idea how lucky they are to have someone in their lives who cares. When my husband receives my care and is relaxed, I am happy. I am not a doormat or a housewife, but it pleases me to show him that I care in small ways, even if it is picking up a dish he left behind. These are simple gestures I performed before marriage and it is important to continue them. Otherwise, I would be changed from the woman he married and that would not be fair to him.

3. It's all about seeing after her

Seeing after her is what a man does to take a her in hand. It is being mindful of her. It's doing the little things that make her feel looked after. It's also about holding her to account. Making demands on her so that she feels valuable, useful. The demands aren't huge, just small requirements easily met but invaluable for giving her the feeling of being important to you. If confronted by a mugger with a gun, I step between her and the gun to protect her. But what if she is a black belt in karate, while I have a belt that matches my black shoes? It that situation, I move away from her distracting the mugger so he doesn't see her kick until it strikes. As my little heroine and I resume our walk, I remind her that we still have to have a chat about her being 3 hours late and not calling. To which, she snuggles closer into my side. Protecting a woman isn't done because she is a victim or unable to care for herself. It is done to make sure that she feels cared for.

4. Passion

Well, actually, I didn't say I hadn't any first-hand knowledge; what I said was my marriage has been fessée-free. I am 62 and I have been married for 30 years. That leaves me nearly half a lifetime to have acquired a sound practical knowledge: the delightful thwap concussion an extended palm makes against a bare female bottom. Not to mention the yeeeaargh! yeeooww! sounds as the total approaches five dozen... the soulful whimpering as the culprit shuffles off to the corner with her drawers about her knees... the faint sobbing as the birch-twigs are bound into a rod for subsequent use... the frantic scratching of the goose-quill pen as the punishment lines ("I must not be a twit") are copied out in a fair round hand... Those were the days.

5. Surprise me

The passion with which you wrote about it absolutely convinced me that you must have first-hand knowledge of the subject. I'm sorry that this desire has apparently remained unfulfilled. But I'm glad you are happy in other ways. Spanking isn't everything after all (no really, it isn't). Anyway, with or without first-hand knowledge, you wrote about it in a way that made me feel better about myself and my desires, and swept away the lingering feeling of distaste and embarrasment I felt about it after my experience of reading those sleazy men's magazines and Ian Gibson's book. Other people must have felt the same way, I can't be the only one who was so affected by it.

6. Trusting american man

As far as I am concerned, being taken thoroughly does not have to involve being roughed up. I am not sexually aggressive, and being ravished, roughed up or whatever has no appeal for me whatever. Being backed into walls leaves me cold. My erotic desire is to submit rather than to be forced. Just about any man could physically overpower me if he wanted to, I'm not a body-builder or a karate black belt or anything. Being physically dominated isn't a big deal to me, anone could do it.

7. Final Words

Well, the truth of your own sexuality is only yours to know. If to submit within romantic sex is your erotic zone then that's simply the way it is. It's as common as its extreme opposite. For my own part, I have yet to meet a woman, who when introduced via escalation to ravishment, isn't erotically stimulated to high heaven. And, incidentally, ravishment involves force but not violence, restraint without pain, aggressiveness with lack of harm, dominance without degredation, freedom within limits, rebellion subjugated to a superior force and in part on the female side, a desire to test and fight in spite of the certain knowledge that victory is not really possible except through surrender. Paradoxical as the last item seems, it's the truth. Part of the satisfaction of the act is bringing the male to loss of control and knowing you brought him to that.